A Rose Once Grew
by The Instincts. Amplified
Summary: 'A rose once grew where all could see, sheltered beside a garden wall, And, as the days passed swiftly by, it spread its branches, straight and tall.' A series of one shots related to JJ's possible exit. Get your tissues out.
1. The Bud That Would Never Blossom

**A Rose Once Grew**

'A rose once grew where all could see,  
sheltered beside a garden wall,  
And, as the days passed swiftly by,  
it spread its branches, straight and tall.  
One day, a beam of light shone through  
a crevice that had opened wide –  
The rose bent gently toward its warmth  
then passed beyond to the other side.  
Now, you who deeply feel its loss,  
be comforted – the rose blooms there,  
Its beauty even greater now,  
nurtured by God's own loving care.'

* * *

_**Author's (singular!) Note: **This is our project for the exit of the fabulous AJ Cook, AKA JJ. We know people have probably already done this, but we've decided to do our own series of one shots dedicated to JJ's possible exits, and interestingly we decided to do them separately, our own solo projects. This is my contribution, and Cara's will be posted tomorrow at the earliest (we want some of them posted before Wednesday for obvious reasons). For those who read our other work, 'Aim For The Heart', fret not. We haven't given up on it, but just decided to try something new, and we've never had JJ as such a central character before, as you guys who've read 'AFTH' know well! This piece ignores 'AFTH' so it isn't necessary to have read and reviewed it (but would be appreciated). This is set early season 6 but doesn't follow the end of season five, it's set after that is resolved and contains general spoilers across the series but especially for Amplification and Revelations (hey it's me and I'm Reid-centric episode obsessed!). Hope you guys like, Cara said she was near tears reading it but she could have been lying! This is one idea I'd have put forward for JJ's exit. Oh and thanks to Cara for discovering the poem, 'A Rose Once Grew'. We don't know who wrote it, but if any of you guys do, give us a heads up! Happy reiding!_

_x Ava (One half of The Instincts. Amplified)_

* * *

_****__The Bud That Would Never Blossom_  
(An 'A Rose Once Grew' one-shot)

She turned over in the extremely uncomfortable hospital bed. She was alone at last.

She'd sent Will away to get something for Henry. She was just so sick of hearing those empty promises he'd been spluttering all day.

"_It happens darlin'. No one knows why, but it does."_

Why does it happen? Why? Where was the justice in that?

"_We can try again in the future."_

It was like he didn't understand that this wasn't a bulb in the house that had gone out and needed replacing. This was their baby. It was supposed to be a new addition to their family. It wasn't supposed to end like this.

* * *

_A few days earlier…._

Supervisory Special Agent Jennifer Jareau had a routine in the morning. She worked such long hard hours and was away so frequently that when she did wake up in her own home, she made sure she was the one to feed Henry. She would go tip-toe into her son's room, and often found that, more often than not, those big blue, yet sleepy eyes would be gazing at her. She would take her son in her arms, and head down stairs with him into the kitchen. She would lovingly place him in his high chair while she prepared his breakfast first, than hers and Will's while Henry ate.

Will would almost always seem to walk right into the kitchen as she was putting the plates on the table, he joked that he had a built in food sensor.

What wasn't a normal morning for SSA Jennifer Jareau was to wake up in the morning and try to make it to the bathroom rather than vomit all over her new carpet, dodging Henry's toys as she ran.

JJ knew the signs, but couldn't quite believe it was happening again.

She was pregnant. She had to be, not only was it the only logical explanation, but in heart she just knew. But as she brushed her teeth to get the taste of vomit out of her mouth, she realised she had a dilemma. Should she tell Will immediately? The team? She wasn't even 100% sure, should she?

Her musings were interrupted, as always, by her cell phone ringing at the wrong moment. She looked at the number which was, as always, an unfamiliar number calling for immediate help - when a case had become too much to handle.

It seemed that telling Will of her suspicions was going to have to wait until after the case. Instead of revealing her discovery to Will, she merely went in and said,

"Sorry. Looks like you have to feed Henry today."

He stirred groggily in their bed, "Got a case, darlin'?"

"Haven't we always?" JJ said with a slight smile.

"Is it a bad one?"

"Isn't it always?"

"Just come back in one piece, darlin'." he said grinning lazily from under the covers.

* * *

"Our UnSub is a complete opportunist," Rossi surmised. "He wants to show off how smart he is. How he can outsmart the BAU."

Morgan agreed, "He didn't abduct Matthew Cook until we arrived at the Kate Murray crime scene."

"So he won't abduct another victim until he's disposed of his latest body." Prentiss said with a tone of bitterness in her voice.

JJ tuned out the profilers, she couldn't listen to them anymore. It was just the cruellest kind of fate. She finds out she's pregnant, and the case thrown their way involves children being abducted and slaughtered. It just wasn't fair.

Her eyes fell to the victims on the board. Three dead, one as of yet, unfound. And they were running out of time. Time made a difference in these cases. JJ couldn't help but think that if they'd been called as soon as six year old Matthew Cook went missing, it might have made the difference between finding him safe and healthy and finding his corpse.

JJ scolded herself at the negative thoughts. They hadn't had any news and therefore JJ was expecting to find a body. But with all the years she'd spent in this job, she knew things rarely ended well. Sure, they'd had cases where some children had been found safely, but JJ could feel the difference in this one. The way young children were killed without mercy, it was certainly up to the team to intervene.

"…will definitely be female." JJ heard Hotch predict. "It's been a pattern. Girl, boy, girl, boy. It's part of his signature. He needs this."

"Guys," Reid interrupted, looking from the geographical profile he had created. "Look at this. Each time he abducts someone, he gets closer to the dumpsite of the last victim."

"Well what does that mean?" JJ asked, not seeing the significance of Reid's theory.

"I think it means," Reid began, "That the next victim - will be abducted at the next dumpsite. Or at least nearby, after all how many children would be present at a crime scene-"

At that moment, the Maryland detective walked in, looking extremely perturbed, "That's quite a theory Dr. Reid."

"Detective?" Rossi questioned the extremely stressed detective.

"We can put Dr. Reid's theory into practise," the detective replied, "Matthew Cook's body was just discovered. On the playground in Quiet Hills Park."

The team stared at each other in horror, before leaving the police station in unison, curious if they could save another child by believing Reid's theory.

JJ had a nagging feeling that perhaps it would be best if she stayed at the station in case things got confrontational, but she ignored it.

She ignored it.

* * *

The team saw why the detective was so stressed once they'd reached the dumpsite. A children's playground. And some of the team recognised it as the playground in the park where several people had been infected with anthrax over a year ago.

That should have been the omen.

"This park has become a little less popular since last year. A few people died pretty mysteriously there last year, I believe the BAU investigated that case." he added meaningfully.

"Who found the body?" Morgan asked tactfully changing the subject.

"Young woman with her daughter. Rachel Grey and her daughter Andrea, four. Rachel's over there with some of our officers. She's still pretty shook up."

"And Andrea?" JJ asked curiously. The detective nodded to a young girl sitting on a swing with her back facing them, facing out towards the park.

"She hasn't said a word since. Mother said it'd be best if we just leave her to think."

The team nodded and headed over to the body, examining it. It had been mercilessly dumped right in the middle of the park where anyone walking past could see it.

Matthew was heavily bruised, like as the others, with some particularly nasty shades of purple around his neckline.

"Strangled, like all the others. This is definitely our guy." Prentiss offered.

"He'd getting younger." Hotch mumbled, a little sick at the thought. JJ forgot how much this must be getting to him too. Matthew was about the same age as Jack, and was even wearing a Captain America t-shirt.

How could anyone do this when they had a family? JJ knew different cases bothered everyone.

Morgan was always affected by cases with children, but for different reasons than JJ and Hotch. It was always the cases with a sexual component against children that made him kick in more doors than usual. And after the incident in Chicago, Hotch and Gideon had seemed to accept this and not question it. It was as if they knew something the rest of the team didn't. Something big.

The cases that got Reid frustrated were the cases involving some form of mental illness. All of the team were impressed, if not surprised with Reid's handling of the schizophrenic man who had taken a train in Texas hostage. They weren't surprised so much at the fact that Reid could recognise the signs, but that he knew exactly what to say. Elle had told them all what Reid had said to him on the train.

_I know what the voices are like._

Of course now they knew better and knew that he knew because of his mother. At least they hoped.

Cases against women and young girls was what seemed to bother Prentiss most. Especially the home invasion case a few years back where the teenage girl was the only survivor in the family, and she had seriously considered taking her in. JJ still remembered the look of disappointment on her face when she was unsuccessful.

Rossi was an enigma, but they all remembered the case where he had shrugged off their assistance (save for Garcia, who he had put together the file). Yet the remainder of the team had been insistent at helping Rossi solve a case that had been haunting him for so long. That he'd put so much time into. It was one of the only cases where Rossi had really admitted how much it had gotten to him.

This case was getting to all of them. They were standing before a young child's body, with the knowledge that they'd been unable to help. And they'd be lucky if the could help the next child who was targeted.

JJ looked at the team again, and noticed that while most of them where exchanging theories on the profile and preoccupied by the body of Matthew Cook, Reid was oddly silent. She went to stand next to him.

"Spence?" she asked quietly. She was surprised when he shushed her indicating that he was watching something. She followed his eye line.

Than she saw him, a rather unremarkable man staring greedily at the young blonde girl sitting on the swings.

Their UnSub.

Than why was Reid just standing there? Why wasn't he trying to help Andrea? JJ began to rush forward to the girl but was held back by Reid.

"Don't let him know you see him," Reid mumbled.

But it was too late. The UnSub had seen them and had managed to get close to Andrea, somehow managed to scoop her up unnoticed, looking like a kind stranger. Than JJ realised why this was going on unnoticed. He was wearing in uniform. A cop. Trusted. One of them.

Reid was determined to make his move as silently as possible to avoid panic, but JJ had no such qualms. She broke into a sprint, trying to break free from Reid's surprisingly strong hands. Must have been all those weeks spent using crutches, she supposed. Reid tried to keep her back, walking at his pace, but JJ saw that his hand was resting against his holster. JJ wondered why Reid hadn't alerted the rest of the team until she turned and saw that they were all absorbed in their own tasks. Prentiss was talking to Rachel Grey, Andrea's mother. Morgan and Hotch were examining Matthew Cook's body in great detail and Rossi was trying to calm the crowds of families that had arrived just to frolic in the park, who had seen the body and were making a bigger scene.

No one seemed to notice that their UnSub was taking Andrea from right under their noses.

The UnSub disappeared from view among the trees, and Reid quickened his pace to keep up with JJ.

They had just reached the point where the UnSub had disappeared, and Reid was in the lead (though JJ couldn't help but notice he was still hobbling slightly). Reid turned the corner first and before JJ could make any sense of what had happened, he was thrown back to the ground.

The UnSub stepped out from behind the tree, with a baton in hand. He was holding Andrea with the utmost negligence. He had his arm wrapped around her chest, so her feet were dangling a few inches from the ground. JJ's hands were trembling too much for her to be able to reach her gun in the holster. Reid was groaning on the ground, curling into a ball. JJ was a little stumped. She hadn't thought he'd been hit that hard.

The UnSub dropped the baton and expertly drew his gun with one hand. He'd been prepared for this. He pointed the gun at JJ. He smiled.

"It's got a silencer on it. I deal with you first, than your little boyfriend, than I take this little lady here without anyone being any the wiser. Until her mother notices the empty swing. And none of the rest of your team will even pick up on it. Until they find your bodies, they'll know that he," he said, indicating Reid who was still on the ground groaning, "was right all along. I wanted to show that I could outsmart the 'smartest minds in the FBI'."

JJ should have done something, anything to avoid her impending death to save herself, but she couldn't move for the shock of it. She could see the trigger about to be pulled…

…and than the earth fell from beneath her. She felt something hit her legs with great force and she was thrown violently to the ground. She felt sharp pains in her stomach as she hit the ground and screamed. She heard another gunshot and didn't know who had been shot. Was that the source of her pain? Or had the UnSub shot Reid or Andrea? She heard a howl of pain and voices calling the distance.

"JJ are you okay?"

Reid's voice was panicked, and his face came into view quite clearly.

"Are you hit?" he asked panicked.

"What?" JJ asked, a little confused. Why was Reid okay now? He'd been writhing in pain only a moment ago.

"You're bleeding. Were you shot?"

JJ was confused for a moment. If she had been shot, the UnSub would have shot her execution style, once in the head. She'd never had the misfortunate luck of being shot, but she knew the pain she was feeling was all wrong for that. But she was bleeding -

"No." JJ said, quietly at first. Than a little louder. "No, no. No, no, no, NO!"

The last cry came in anguish, and JJ heard a small voice ask, "What's wrong with her Mister?" over the shouts of alarm and howl of agony that JJ assumed was coming from their UnSub.

"JJ?" Reid said quietly. JJ knew she was going to have to tell someone now, before the crowd joined them. She knew Reid would only tell who was necessary, and let her tell the team in her own time.

"Spence," JJ called quietly, indicating for him to lean right in. She saw all the blood drain from his face when she admitted to him,

"I'm pregnant."

Everything passed as a blur after that. She heard voices drift in and out. She was blocking it all out. Trying to numb all feeling. She knew what was coming, what she was going to be told.

JJ had never been rushed to the hospital in a manner like this before. She'd been there when it happened for Reid (both times) seen him put on a gurney, she'd waited on results for Reid, Garcia and Hotch on several occasions but the worst that had happened to JJ herself was going into labour in the BAU, and being hit over the head by an UnSub who believed she was a vampire of some kind. Never something to this degree of seriousness.

She had to distance herself from everything, she only caught a few words that were being thrown her way but knew the majority of them were empty promises. Promises that she was young and healthy and she could try again in a few months. But all that didn't matter now. She'd failed.

Her baby had died.

* * *

She enjoyed being alone the following days, she couldn't face company

She hadn't been alone for long when the door opened again. JJ groaned and rolled over in her bed, expecting to see Will standing there with Henry again, still full of his promises of trying again. It was his mantra since the incident.

But instead standing awkwardly as always, at the door of the hospital room was Reid. JJ was surprised for a few reasons. The first being that Reid was the only team member who hadn't visited him yet. Garcia had been first in, Prentiss second. Both had been quite sympathetic and Prentiss was the only person JJ had seen since the incident who hadn't assured her there was always next time. JJ suspected she knew more about this than she was letting on. She looked back at the final member of the team to visit her.

Reid just stood at the door avoiding her eyes.

"Spence, you can come in you know." she said quietly. Reid was scaring her. She'd seem him withdrawn during his darkest moments, and this was too reminiscent of that. He slowly made his way to the bedside, but just stood there.

It hit JJ that the last time Reid had been standing at her bedside, she had named him godfather of her baby and they had been surrounded by several cards, banners and balloons reading 'It's a boy!'. And this time the only cards around them read things like 'Thinking of you', 'Deepest sympathies' and 'Sorry for your loss'.

JJ moved over slightly in her bed to allow Reid enough room to sit alongside her. When he failed to comply, she made it a direct order.

"Sit." she commanded, and Reid gently sat down next to her. But he still wasn't looking at her. JJ decided it was time to get direct.

"Spence, you're scaring me," she admitted, "What's wrong?"

Reid laughed a little but there was a bitterness to it that JJ had not heard in a long time. He stayed turned away from her when he replied, "Me? What about you? You've been scaring everyone the last few days. They all said you'd been acting distant with them, not looking at them -"

"Like you are now." JJ argued, and Reid winced. He sighed and for the first time turned to look at her.

JJ instinctively knew what was wrong, she'd been there herself. There was always dark shadows under his eyes, but there was something more sinister about it this time. Obviously the baton to the face had caused the dark bruising around his left eye and the stitches running above his eyebrow, but the dark shadows under his eyes were caused by something else. Guilt.

Reid looked directly at her as he spoke again with great sincerity, "I am so sorry."

JJ shook her head, "It's alright. It wasn't your fault."

The irony of the situation wasn't lost on them. It had been three and half years but no one from the team would ever forget that night in a hurry.

"Yes it was." Reid continued. "I caused it."

JJ was confused, "How? I fell, Spence you couldn't have -"

"You didn't fall." he admitted hurriedly. He looked away from her again, "I just… I didn't know. If I had known, I wouldn't have done it. But the profile said he would most certainly shoot you if I didn't do someth-"

"Spence!" JJ called. He stopped before stating slowly.

"It's my fault JJ. I knocked you to the ground - I kicked your legs from under you just as he was pulling the trigger. I thought it was the safest option -"

"Spence." JJ said forcefully. Reid stopped his rant and turned to look at her.

"You hate me don't you?" he asked slowly. JJ looked horrified.

"Why would I hate you?" she asked dumbfounded

"I caused this. It's my fault -"

"You didn't cause this. I knew the risks. I shouldn't have gone with you. I should've -"

"_I _should've stopped you. We should've split up-"

"Because that worked so well last time." JJ argued. Reid looked very hurt by the comment. He spoke slowly.

"Last time is irrelevant." his tone was a little clipped, and JJ knew she'd hit a nerve. None of them talked about Georgia. Not to each other, and especially not to Reid.

"No. It isn't. This is role reversal. I felt guilt just like you are now, I felt so incredibly-"

"This is different," Reid interrupted, "You didn't throw me to Tobias. And you got hurt in Georgia too -"

"Just like you did," JJ said, indicating Reid's forehead. He shrugged it off.

"But the repercussions this time are different. You… you lost something very important to you. Once I was rescued, I -"

"Roll up your sleeves." JJ interrupted. Reid's eyes widened.

"What?"

"Roll up your sleeves," JJ repeated. Reid looked at her in alarm, and she continued, "Spence. We _all _knew. I think it's part of the reason it hurt that much more when Gideon left, because he _knew_. He knew you were going through nothing any of us had ever been through, but he left. And he only explained himself to you. Than Strauss decides to sit in on a case? And I'm fairly sure you had suspicions that we knew. You work with profilers!"

"But -"

"No, Spence, this isn't as different as you're making it out to be. I know you feel guilty, but I should have stayed back. Hell I should have been holding back the crowd, not Rossi - that was my job."

Reid was quick to pick up on it, "Was?"

JJ smiled sadly. "That's another difference between you and me Reid. You're a stronger person than any of us give you credit for. Everything you've been through and yet you keep coming back. I wish I was that strong…"

"JJ-"

"It's not your fault Reid. This was my wake up call. It took losing my baby for me to realise my priorities are all wrong. I missed so much of Henry growing up for this job. I thought I'd learned my lesson after the anthrax scare -" she didn't miss Reid's wince at her words, but she continued like she had, "I was more worried for Henry than I was for you - you have a habit of beating the odds. But I'm Henry's mother, I'm supposed to protect him but I couldn't even call to warn him. It wasn't fair. This job isn't fair. I don't know how I've done it for as long as I have with all the terrible things we've seen, the terrible things we've experienced. But I think the time has come for me to see if I can step away from this job."

Reid nodded in complete understanding. "Believe me, I know how that feels. I've tried JJ but -"

"But you use your brain to help others. Maybe one day when you have baby geniuses with somebody you love, you'll understand why I have to do this."

Reid nodded and stood up to left, and JJ was relieved to see that a weight seemed to have been lifted from his shoulders. As he reached the door, he turned back, and asked the hard question. The one none of them had dared to ask,

"Why didn't you tell any of us you were pregnant?"

JJ looked at him sadly before explaining, "I wasn't even sure if I was myself. I am now."

* * *

_So, like it? Hate it? Reviews are love? Let us know if we're as good apart as we are together! Knowing our luck this has already been done though... (trust us, it's happened!)_


	2. The Rose That Wept

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A/N 

_Ava's little fic is definitely a hard one to follow, isn't it? If you haven't read it yet, go! Now! First Chapter! Click that button! __Hopefully someone will be feeling generous and leave moi a little review too? I'd love to know what you guys think!_

_~Cara (one half of The Instincts; Amplified.)_

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_x_

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* * *

_

**The Rose That Wept**

**(An 'A Rose Once Grew' one-shot)**

A wail filled the BAU. It was such an odd sound it immediately had everyone looking around for the source of the noise.

No one expected to find this.

The usually poised and immaculately dressed Supervisory Special Agent Jennifer Jareau was standing at the doors of the BAU, looking nothing like her regular calm and collected self. Her hair was thrown up into a ponytail, which was in the process of falling down, leaving strands of it pasted to her grey ashen face. Henry, although young, could tell that something was wrong and voicing this opinion on the situation.

JJ wandered into the bullpen, oblivious to the worried stares she was receiving. Her attention was complete focused on the light coming from the office above them.

Coming closer to the desks of her it team it was only than everyone realised, something was very wrong.

Reid approached her carefully, "JJ what's… what's wrong? Has something happened?"

JJ handed the young genius the still shrieking toddler.

The extremity of the situation fully hit the team - JJ's hands were covered in blood. Fresh blood.

Morgan grabbed the young blonde's arm. "Hey, hey, hey JJ. Stop. What happened?" Noticing the amount of blood, he automatically reached for his gun.

The liason didn't wait. Immediately after handing over her baby, she threw off Morgan's hand and was heading towards the office of BAU Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner. She didn't bother knocking, instead choosing to walk straight in.

After one glance, Hotch was on his feet and rushing to her side.

"JJ, whose blood is that?" He led her shaking form to the visitor's chair before crouching down beside her.

'It's my fault Hotch. I'm armed. Heck I'm frickin' FBI, and it's him? How is that right? It should have been me, if Henry hadn't woken up it would have been me."

"JJ slow down a second. What happened?"

"He's gone Hotch. Will's gone." She looked at her hands before rubbing them together in the hope that it might remove the blood.

"Come on," Hotch said. Taking her hand he eased her up out of the chair and led her to the door. They walked through the bullpen, the objects of everyone's gaze.

He squeezed her hand in reassurance.

Finally reaching the bathroom, JJ turned to him, still in a trance-like state. "What are… what are we doing here?"

"We need to clean your hands." Hotch stated simply, pushing open the door to the ladies.

"You can't go in there Hotch, it's the ladies' restroom."

"I'm a rebel, JJ," he replied, gently pushing her in.

* * *

Prentiss hurried into the bullpen. "I saw JJ's car outside - why is there blood on Henry's shirt?"

"That's what we've been trying to figure out Emily." Reid sighed. "He's not physically hurt. So the blood -"

"Definitely came from JJ." Morgan nodded.

"Whoa! Wait, what?" Emily exclaimed dumping her bag on her desk.

"JJ wandered in here with Henry about 10 minutes ago. She gave Reid the little man and vanished up to Hotch's office."

"-and Henry won't stop crying!" declared the genius in frustration.

"Here give him to me," Emily offered.

"Gladly," Spencer muttered, handing him over.

The brunette rocked the toddler gently. "What happened, hmmm? What happened to you and mommy?"

Henry looked up at her, his eyelashes stuck together, his face still damp with tears. He reached for a lock of her hair to play with before mumbling, "Da da da…"

JJ stood in front of the sink, seeming confused as to what she was meant to do.

Hotch sighed before rolling up his sleeves and turning on the tap for her. He pushed her hands under the running water and said,

"Start from the beginning."

* * *

_"JJ, think about it. There's no need to bring it. We're going to the zoo, not on a raid. You don't need your gun."_

_"Yes, I do. What if something happens or if I get called for a case? I'd have to come back and get it and then…"_

_"Darlin', bring it if it makes you feel better, but you're not going to need it at the zoo… unless a chipmunk attacks you!" Will teased as JJ poured them both coffee._

_She sat on the counter, next to the toaster as Will opened a pack of pop tarts._

_"It does," she said, sticking out her tongue._

_"Jennifer! he said seeming outraged, his eyes twinkling with his suppressed smile, "you're meant to be the adult. Miss FBI, mother…"_

_"Future Mrs LaMontagne." she giggled, fluttering her eyes._

_"I'll hold you to that!" Will smiled, before leaning in to kiss her._

_"I gotta go get ready," JJ sighed. She looked down at her current ensemble; yoga pants and an FBI t-shirt. Her hair was in a ponytail, she hadn't had time to do anything else with it._

_"And don't say I look beautiful as I am." she mock threatened, hopping off the counter-top._

_"What if it's true?" he asked._

_"You are -" she was interrupted by the whimpering of a hungry baby._

_" - so lucky." she finished with a giggle._

_"I found you didn't I?" he called as she headed up the stairs._

_She laughed._

_Seeing Henry standing up in his cot, she picked him and swung him around before settling him on her hip._

_"So buddy, you wanna go to the zoo? Yeah? Me too!"_

_She set him into the playpen. "Momma's going to go get ready, and then once we've all had some breakfast, we can head off, how's that sound?"_

_JJ put the combination into the safe and just as she picked up her gun she heard glass shattering and a thud._

_She knew better then to call out. _

_Instead she headed cautiously down the hallway, pausing only to shut Henry's bedroom door._

_Hearing a gunshot, she hurried to the kitchen. She knew she would never forget the scene before her._

_Will was lying on the floor, a pool of blood forming around him. A tall man was standing above him, gun limp in his hand._

_Hearing her footsteps, the man turned around, alarm in his eyes. "Lady I'm sorry. I thought you'd all be in bed. I didn't mean to hurt -"_

_Excuses meant nothing to her anymore; she stared back at him with hard, unfeeling eyes._

_"Please, Mrs. I-"_

_Bang._

_She dropped on her knees next to Will. "You need to keep your eyes open. Keep talking to me -"_

_"JJ, I know, I've done this before. Granted I wasn't the one on the ground, but I know the drill."_

_He winced as she pressed her hands against his chest to try and stop the bleeding. His breaths were shallow and harsh._

_"…Henry?"_

_"Upstairs, he's fine."_

_Will nodded, his eyes fluttering closed._

_"Will! No!" she pushed her hands harder against his chest._

_"Ow! Jayje, easy!"_

_"You closed your eyes!"_

_"I'm not allowed blink now?"_

_"Nope, sorry."_

_He chuckled slightly, before coughing and wincing. His eyes fluttered again._

_"Stay with me! Will!"_

* * *

JJ watched as the pink water swirled down the drain. Hotch's hands gently wiped away the remaining blood.

_"You'll be okay. You have the team. Henry'll be okay. He has you."_

"Hotch?" JJ said quietly.

"Yes?"

"Will's dead."

"I thought so," he replied, drying her hands.

"Oh god… he's actually dead." she dropped slowly to the ground, sobs gradually wracking her body.

Hotch knelt next to her, before pulling her into a hug. She rested her head on his shoulders as she cried, the reality of the situation hitting her.

Will was gone.

* * *

**One week later…**

She hadn't been alone since that morning. The team had taken turns staying with her and Henry. She had managed to find half an hour to herself. Enough time to write the letter.

The usually poised and immaculately dress Supervisory Special Agent Jennifer Jareau was standing at the doors of the BAU. She wandered in to the bullpen, pausing at her team's desks.

Reid called out to her, his voice gentle. "JJ… what's… what's wrong? Has something happened?"

JJ handed the young genius her currently gurgling toddler.

Morgan didn't stop her this time as she headed for the stairs.

The liaison didn't wait. Immediately after handing over the baby, she headed towards the office of BAU Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner. Before she opened the door, she turned to look down into the bullpen. Her team looked back up at her.

She smiled, "I'm fine. I promise."

She knocked gently on the door and hearing the quiet "Come in" she entered.

"JJ," Hotch said setting down his pen and closing the file before him. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to drop this off." she said, placing the ivory envelope on his desk. He looked at it, before leaning back in his seat.

JJ sat on the edge of the visitors chair. "I don't know how you managed to come back after Haley. I do know I'm not like you Hotch. I can't do this," she waved her hand, looking around the office, "and be a good mom to Henry. Not without Will."

She stood up. "So I'm resigning."

Hotch nodded. He seen this coming. After everything she'd been through, he'd have been more suprised if she'd decided to stay.

He stood and stepped around the desk to stand next to her. "It's not going to be the same with out you, Jayje." He pulled her into a hug, before whispering, "Stay in touch?"

She hugged him back, tightly. "Promise."

They broke apart, neither sure what to say next.

JJ shifted awkwardly

Hotch chuckled, "Jennifer Jareau, speechless? I never thought I'd see the day."

She smiled before looking up at him seriously. "Thank you. For what you did that day...and ...well for everything." she stepped back towards the door

He nodded, following her.

"I'll visit," she promised.

"I'll hold you to that," Hotch replied, with a slight smile.

* * *

_"Will, open your eyes! NO! Don't do this to me! We need you. Please, open your eyes. Look at me! Please? Will?"_

_The toaster popped. _

_The Poptarts were burnt._

* * *

_Review? I'll give you poptarts for love!_


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